In its seventh year of existence, the much-anticipated annual YouTube video that celebrates the unique hairstyles of Minnesota’s best prep hockey players has turned… poetic.
After a quick jab at the sitting POTUS’s notorious hairstyle, our droll narrator (John King) channels the likes of Whitman, Wilde, Poe and Dylan to grace his viewers with a poem honoring the hair highlights of this past weekend’s tourney, before taking us through his picks for this year’s AHH team.
Let’s go to the videotape…
And the best five lines of this year’s edition…
#5 — “We call this next look the ‘Charlie Sheen’ because Tanner’s mullet has party in the back and the front.”
#4 — “You know what the definition of ‘intense’ is? Being the only guy on your team to dye your hair. We call this the ‘Raggedy Andy.'”
#3 — “At the top of the charts we have Reagan Garden. They don’t tell you his middle name is ‘Olive’ because he brought unlimited salad to the tournament for everyone.”
#2 — “It’s too bad CNN spent all that money looking for Jesus when he was playing for the Warriors in Blaine the whole time.”
#1 — “With the puck poetry theme I went to work on my lettuce lyric, my salad sonnet. When you have dirty junk like this, there’s no reason to wear bucket, or bonnet.”
Congratulations to Reagan Garden and all the members of the 2017 All Hockey Hair Team. And kudos to John King and the folks at Game On! Minnesota for continuing this… strange Minnesota tradition.
Oh, and as for the actual hockey, Hermantown (or ‘Hairmantown‘) edged the Monticello/Annandale/Maple Lake 4-3 in double overtime for their second straight Class A championship.
In Class 2A, Grand Rapids downed Moorhead 6-3 to capture their first title since 1980.
Images via: YouTube — All Sport